It was the 5pm tantrum that pushed me over the edge, but to be fair to the two year old, the last two days were pretty close to perfectly imperfect with all four. Tantrums, whinging, fighting, backchat...the kind of day that you hold back the tears until you can't possibly hold them back for another second.
Well that was me yesterday. I stood there in the kitchen, in front of all my children and just sobbed. Those heaving sobs that come from deep within. Those sobs where you have to catch you breath before you let the next one out. Those sobs that turn your eyes into black salty rivers and your nose into equally as unappealing snotty torrents. Know the ones?
In retrospect I wish I had seen the kids faces, it may have given me an insight into the depth of guilt, but the tears were so intense I couldn't focus on anything. It took some time, but as the night rolled on each one gave me an apology in their own special way and tonight hubby has booked a restaurant, just the two of us. (maybe I should bung this on more often, just kidding, they were very real tears yesterday).
But today is another day and this morning I picked myself some blossoms, poured myself a cuppa and sat in the sun with a mag ALL BY MYSELF
....for 30 seconds...
Life goes on.
Liv xo
Yes I've known those tears Olivia (except mine have never come and apologised!). I hope you had a lovely evening just the two of you and it refuelled you for another day at least. The mag and the cuppa sounds perfect! x
ReplyDeleteDinner was lovely, very civil. we regrouped for yet another day! Thanks for popping by xx
ReplyDeletei commented on this yesterday on my phone and for some reason it never went through. But I hear you loud and clear...except my two are half yours and and too old for tantrums. We are renovating and it just seems like our lives are in 5th gear all the time. Last night Nic said something at dinner that was on a normal day quite OK. Well I broke down and sobbed so much. Love this blog Liv.
ReplyDeletetx
Renovating is the pits. Mum and Dad have had 26 homes and every single one was a reno! Poor mum.
ReplyDeleteThey have incredible foresight my folks!
It won't be long Tiel and definitely worth a few cries x